Yard Schmard

While house hunting, I looked at A LOT of houses.  I'm sure my realitor wanted to trade me off a couple times.  When I finally found something great, I made an offer.  The first time, it didn't go so well.  The second time (six months later), I became a house owner.  I chose the house for it's layout, great use of windows and natural light.  It also had a nice lawn.  At first, I thought the lawn was great.  I love all the green and the backyard is seeminly a bird and squirrel sanctuary.  There is nothing better then sitting on the couch staring out into the backyard.  Not to mention, Ollie loves it.  He can spend hours just walking around and inspecting the yard.  Apparently it's excellent for sun naps too.  If the weather isn't nice, he sits inside and stares longing outside.   

As time and that first summer season came upon me... I realized just how much work all this green was!  Now, I do mow my yard.  I probably..okay I don't... mow it as much as my neighbors wish.  I try to mow it at least once a week.  And.. let me confess... I don't even own a weedeater.  Does that make me a bad person??? Honestly, I probably mow more of the fear of being fined by the city and/or picketed by the neighbors then my actual desire to mow.  It's not that I don't like the look of a nicely manicured lawn.  I do.  I like the feel of well maintained grass under my feet.  I just don't have the time!

Let me explain a little about my 'hood:  I live in a neighborhood where half the folks are retirement age.  Great for them!  Great for their lawns!  Some of these folks have plush green lawns that are nicer to walk on then the carpet in my living room.  They mow it at least twice a week, weed eat and water it often.  They fertilize, spray for weeds and keep it manicured.  How can a single, working gal keep up with all of that?  I can't.

Spring has jumped in ahead of time with all of this lovely, unseasonably warm weather.  Sure, it's been nice not worrying about an ice storm or losing power due to a pile of snow.  However, in all this sunshine and warmth, my lawn started growing and greening.  At first I tried to pretend it wasn't happening.  I was hoping that maybe it was just a warm week.  Now I know it wasn't.  My lawn has taken off.  I actually had neighbors who started mowing in February.  I ignored it...pretended not to see them.  I was hoping it would take my lawn longer to mature.  Maybe my lawn was a late developer.  Surprisingly, it didn't and wasn't.  Instead, my lawn took off and somewhere along the line got on the wrong path.  I swear all these weeds weren't here last year!   (Okay, maybe half of them were, but where did the rest of these weeds come from???)  I'm now facing a full on, crazy weed epidemic.  It's too the point that I'm afraid I might lose Ollie in the weeds next time he runs outside.     

So I've come up with a couple options for my yard:  

Option A:  Take out all the grass and cover with rocks.  Although, I'm slightly worried about creating a big snake home in my front yard.

Option B: Put in astro-turf.  Drawback: You definitely must clean up the doggie poo... You can't use the..."it's fertilizing the lawn" excuse.

Option C: Win the lottery and hire a lawn crew!  Must buy the lottery ticket first..and then win.  Hey!  Someone needs to win it. 

Option D: Have the lawn sprayed!  At this point, it's going to take SEVERAL treatments.

Option E: Suck it up...and carry on with doing my own yard work. 

After assessing my time, lawn and budget... I settled on Option E.  Over spring break, I decided I would take on this bed of weeds that I call a lawn.  I headed out to Home Depot to arm myself with the right tools.  I was going to march in there, grab my product and head home for the spraying.  What happened instead... was I marched on into the store and became overwhelmed by all the options and choices and then stared dumbfounded at the products.  Fifteen minutes later, I wrangled the 'lawn specialist' to ask a series of dumb questions.  (I know what you're thinking.  There are such a thing as a dumb question.  Don't pretend there isn't.)  The specialist questioned me about what exactly was growing.  I then listed off... the weed with the purple flower...and the tall clumps that feather on the ends..and let's not forget the vining weed.. that has little groups of leaves.  Mmmmmm Hmmmm... florists daughter right here!  Degree in Biology... Yep.  The little weed with the purple flower.  The specialist nicely recommended some products.  I then remembered that I had taken some pics of my lawn to show my friends just how bad it was.  I thought maybe it would help to show the specialist.  After looking at my pictures for about ten seconds, the specialist said.."Whoa. Wow.  Okay, new plan.  You're going to need something much stronger and perhaps a couple rounds."  My lawn is so bad that it made a lawn specialist take a step back!  See for yourself:




















Four products..and sixty dollars later, I left ready to take on the weeds.  After spraying the lawn (and then showering because I had to use the super strength stuff) I sat and stared at my weeds.  Apparently, it's going to take more then an hour to kill these bad boys. 

Round 1: Winner... The lawn (or what's left of it under the weeds).

Soap Box: Big Feet

That's right!  I said big feet, not big foot.  Why? Because we're talking about my two big feet.  No, they aren't abnormal.  I don't have a health issue.  They aren't weird looking.  In fact, I think my feet look quite nice as feet goes.  (I may be a bit biased, but even my friend De says I have nice toes as far as feet go.  She hates feet.)  My toes aren't strange shaped or hairy.  No fungus or strange lumps and bumps, and I try my best to keep them looking nice.  After all, pedicures are a girl's best friend.  They just look like feet...except larger. 

My shoe size is a woman's size 12.  To put this into perpsective for the men reading this, a lady's size 12 is like a man's size 10 or 10 1/2.  My feet don't look large on my body.  I am six feet tall.  (Although I recently had a dream that my doctor's chart said 5'10" and it really irked me. As if those two inches would make me a normal height.)  My feet look normal on my body.  If I wore a size 6, it would look like there were toes coming out of my ankles.  And who wants that?  Think about skiing.  The taller you are, the longer your skiis get.  It's a proportion thing.  It's the same way with my feet. 

Now the unforunate part is that with a size 12 foot, you can't just buy your shoes anywhere.  That doesn't happen.  Most stores don't carry that size.  Heck, many brands don't even make that size.  In fact, Nordstrom's Rack makes a whole special event around them, the large size shoe event.  Go ahead.  Laugh.  I love that event!  It's the time of year when I can try on multiple pairs of shoes at once.  I wait for it.  Will my reminder postcard be coming soon?? 

Usually if that size is in a store, it comes in one of the following three models: Tennis Shoes, Gold High Heels or Multicolored Pumps!  Now who doesn't need a pair of tennis shoes?  But if that's all you have?  They just don't look right with my black dress pants.  Even now I'll confess:  I've bought men's tennis shoes before!  What?  You couldn't tell the difference or some of you were at least nice enough not to point it out.  And Gold and Multicolored?  What??  My choice is to be athletic or a drag queen!    (I love drag queens.  I just can't wear their shoes.)  I just don't understand why it's sooooo much harder to make shoes in my size.  I gaurantee I'm not the only one searching for them. 

What I don't need:  I don't need or want 3" heels.  At this point I can already see over most people's heads.  Have you even been in a room and suddenly realized that you're the tallest person there?  It's strange looking at the tops of everyone's heads, and this has happened to me more than once.  Can I please get something without velcro?  I'm not ready to resign myself to the orthopedic shoes quite yet; although, I hear they're super comfortable.  Is it asking too much to get something with a little padding and support?  If I wanted a pair of super flat, flats... I would just tape cardboard to the bottom of my feet!  And maybe.. just maybe... a little bit of style?  I don't need the latest runway fashion, but I would enjoy something within the last five years.  One more request: Can I get this pair of shoes for under $200???  Is all of this really asking for too much?  Do I need to become a shoe designer?  What does that pay?  And can it support my student loans?

And that's my rant...  I'll step down from the soap box now.  

St. Paddy's Day

If you're going to blog on St. Patrick's, don't you at least have to mention it?  At least those are the rules I received with my "so you think you can blog" packet of information. 

Let's talk green!  I love St. Patrick's Day.  Am I Irish? Not that I'm aware of. Have I spent a lot of time in Ireland?  I wish!  Have I seen, caught or met a leprechaun? This is a tricky question.  I think I might have met a few of them out and about.  It's hard to tell between short, creepy guys and leprechauns sometimes.  Unfortunately, I can't confirm it and I don't have picture proof.  Does it matter that these things don't pertain to me? Or that I haven't experienced them?  Nope! 

I think in general people just like a reason to get together and be festive.  I'm no different.  In general I enjoy holidays and themed parties that involve libations.  (Notice: I did not say I enjoy getting drunk.  I've reached the age where I don't want to spend the next several days recovering.  No fun involved in the recovery! And frankly I don't have the extra time.)  I do actually enjoy getting dressed up.  As for St. Patty's Paddy's Day, I look good in green.  Lucky me!  And drunken pinches sometimes hurt so green it is!  I also like the bands.  I enjoy being outside before it's blazing hot in Oklahoma.  And who doesn't like a fun faring crowd?  Okay, adult beverages don't hurt; although, I can't remember the last time I had a craving for green beer.   

What's my point?  Live a little!  Strap on your shamrock pants and get out there!

P.S.  I've been informed.  It's St. Paddy's Day... from the Irish Padraig...

Warning: Shamrock pants don't look
as cute when you get older!
My niece is adorable in them!

Zombie Dog

Last night after a rousing game of Bunco.....(Yes, I said Bunco!) ... I came home to find this.... Zombie Dog!

P.S.  Yes, I play Bunco.  Yes, it is a dice game.  Yes, I like it.  We should really be more of a dinner group because this wonderful group of ladies really just want to get together, eat and talk.

Shaping and Molding

I've just come off my weekend high. Now.. before you get all shocked.. it's not drug induced.  My mother was here to visit!  My family is close knit.  I often talk to multiple family members every day and none of them live in the same town!  When together, we spend A LOT of time together.  We aren't one of those you show up for lunch and then go home families.  When we're together, it's common to spend all day long together doing various activities.  So this past weekend, mom and I spent the whole weekend doing semi girly things.  I say semi because there were no pedicures, waxing or dying of anything this weekend.  Instead we hit up our usual run down.  Things you know will happen when my mom visits:

• Lots of eating out! - Yes, we could eat in. No, we don't want to eat in.  That's part of the charm of visiting for us. 
• Movie time! - It's more like a movie marathon.  We often see several movies in the course of a weekend. 
• Shopping - For what is the big question?
• Shaping and Molding - Special bonding time indeed!

Let me explain that last bullet.  My mother insists that her job is never done.  Keep in mind none of us are 'young' anymore.  We're all fully grown adults who have been living on their own for at least ten years more or less.  However, mom insists that there is always more shaping and molding to be done.  If your mother doesn't use these words, let me clue in.  Shaping and molding is a nice way of saying I'm about to lecture you on some topic.  It usually starts with this sentence.  "So Ephanie... I've been thinking..... " and then the lecture begins.  When she starts it, she usually pauses her finger on her lips for a second like she is thoughtfully thinking of what comes next.  Maybe she is deciding how to approach.  Sometimes it's a direct lecture.  Sometimes it's more covert involving a lot of questions and personal reflections.  Either way you know that sentence means something isn't right according to mom.  Go ahead and prepare yourself for the conversation.  It's going to happen at some point during the weekend.     

P.S. Even with the molding and shaping, I had a great weekend.  I love it when my mother visits!
   

Introducing Mr Oliver Bowser!

I thought it was about time to introduce my trusty sidekick, Oliver Bowser.  I had him fill out this little questionnaire in his spare time!

Mr. Oliver Bowser!

Name: Oliver Bowser
Nicknames: Stinky Pete, Ollie, Grumbles, Corn Chip
Birth date: August 2007
Weight: 54 Pounds
# of Wrinkles on Neck: Lost Count!
Shoe Size: Large X-Large
Best Friend: Isabella (aka Bella and Deafus Pinkus)

Your Hobbies include:
Long walks around the block
Chasing squirrels
Sun bathing in the back yard
Napping with Bella
Daydreaming while staring out the window

Your Favorite Foods are:
Dog Food
People Food
Treats
Anything that Smells like Food, FOOD!  Hey!  I'm a basset hound.  What did you expect?

Your Favorite Activity is:
Having my belly rubbed!  Or my neck.. or behind my head... or just touch me!  I'm pretty partial to brush time as well!

If you could change one thing about you, what would it be? 
These short legs!  I was suppose to be taller. 

Bella and Ollie cuddling!

Your Favorite Words:
Walk
Picante Sauce
Brush
Squirrel
TREAT!
And my name!

Other things you enjoy:
Car rides!
Cuddling
Ice Cubes 

Happy Napping Everyone!

Thing you don't like:
The Vacuum
Fireworks
Thunder
Nail Clipping

Your favorite napping place:
On the couch? (Don't tell her!)
In a sun spot in the backyard
On the back porch
On the bed... when no one is looking!

And on that note, it's time for a nap!

Grocery Shopping Carts: Single or Married?

As a newly single gal, I have been taking note of some of the differences between being in a relationship and being single.  Now.. before you get all worked up to defend your side of the coin, I will say that both have their benefits and their downfalls.  I'm not judging!  I'm just talking about the differences and grocery shopping is one of those things.  It's a little game I play with myself when shopping: Single or Married?  Let me explain. 

Married folks (or long time relationship people): Try to remember when you were single.  If that is too long ago for you, just picture what types of food you might buy for kids.  This should help you with this post. 

When in a relationship, you tend to grocery shop for a full meal.  That's right! Coupled people want an entree, a side dish or two and possibly even some dessert.  Many times you feel compelled to make sure you have a protein, fruits and vegetables.  Crazy!  Your cart tends to be full of ingredients to prepare these meals.  You buy the staples knowing that you could whip up several different dishes in a matter of seconds.  You stock your pantry with some extras.  You actually look up and prepare recipes!  Plus your carts tend to be fairly full.  After you add all those ingredients and dishes, there isn't a ton of extra room especially if you add kids to the mix.   

As a single person without kids, your cart looks totally different.  In the fruit and veggie department, you purchase things like two bananas, a couple apples, or two potatoes.  You tend to have twenty-two different breakfast items in your cart like juice, cereal, oatmeal or granola.  For most of us, it's the main meal we eat at home, and really, cereal is acceptable for supper when eating alone.  In addition, you also buy things like lunchables.  They make great lunches or suppers with next to no mess!  Often you find a stack of frozen meals.  For women, they tend to be Lean Cuisines or Smarts Ones.  For men, it's more like Hungry Man Meals.  Then there are the single serving sizes of anything and everything imaginable.  (Yes couples, we do know that they cost more than buying the regular sized package and separating it into smaller packages.  Who really wants to do all that?)  You might also notice a random item such as Pizza Rolls which are also acceptable for a meal.  On top of all that, we tend to buy a selection of beverages, alcoholic and non-alcoholic.  We will pretend it's our need to stay hydrated!  Overall there is an airy feel to our cart.. lots of extra space.            

Well.. that about covers the differences.  Yes, I know some of those statements may have been slight generalizations.  Please don't sue me!  And the next time you go to the grocery store, look at some people's carts.  I'm sure with this overly helpful post, you will be able to spot the singletons from the coupled folks in a matter of seconds.  Be careful not to laugh too loudly when it hits you.  Too much laughing by yourself tends to make you look a little crazy. 

Total Bonus Side Story: A couple nights ago, I mustered up the strength to go grocery shopping.  If you can't tell, this isn't my favorite thing to do; however, my mother is coming into town and I wanted to stock up for the occasion.  I decided I would go to the store on my way home from work.  If there is one thing I know, it's me.  If I went home and sat down, I would rationalize not going at all.  Then I would panic because my mom would be arriving and I have no food!  There is something about my fridge full of condiments and wine that concerns her.  I'm not sure exactly what yet.  Anyway, I made myself go.  Keep in mind, I'm still wearing my work clothes for the day, black dress and heels.  (Okay! So I don't wear that kind of clothes to work every day, but I really did that day!)  The point is.. I wasn't looking like I was homeless or a struggling college student.   

I arrived at the grocery store and started making my way through the familiar isles.  Then I reached the bakery area.  For those of you who don't understand the significance of this, let me explain.  I LOVE cookies, cupcakes and cakes.  Don't try to give me that whipped topping.  It's butter cream or nothing baby!   As I stared at all the yummy baked goods, I was trying to convince myself that I could indeed buy one cookie or one brownie to make a girl feel better.  As I was eyeing the options, the bakery lady came to the counter.   I told her I was just looking for the moment.  Her next comment was.... "you're shopping hungry, aren't you?"  Was it that obvious?  How exactly was I looking at those sweets?  Could she really see the yearning in my eyes?  Or was it the single people food in my mini cart.  Next she gave me a newly made..and frosted!.. sugar cookie to "take the edge off my hunger."  I'm not sure if this was a sales tactic or if I was just looking that pathetic.  Either way, I had to buy a few more after that sampling!



Starting Out... Again.

It was a cold and rainy night... Wait.  Wrong assignment.  Can I start over again? 

For as long as I can remember, I have either been working at a college or taking classes.  Why should this year be any different?  In a moment of pure craziness, I decided I would start working on my PhD.  I mean what else would I want to do with my free time?  And who really likes naps anyway?  In the moment, it seemed perfectly logical.  Heck, I even have a group of friends that started with me, a little co-hort of sorts.  (Technically we're the ex-hort because we've already switched programs once.)  So... here goes nothing!  I must confess that I still question this decision every semester.  There is that moment of panic as I start a new class when I wonder what was I thinking?  Is it too late to get out?? Then I tell myself, I can do anything for sixteen weeks.  Sounds like fun, right?  You should join us!

As part of a class I'm taking on the weekends, I'm required to try out different types of technology.  In February I dipped my toe in the pool and tried out Doodle.  I know... not very exciting.  In March, I'm jumping all the way in!  So.. let the blogging begin.  For this experience, I'll be waxing philosophical about the trials and tribulations of my life.  Let's face it.  In my free time, I don't want to write about technical issues or research.  I do enough of that in class.  Of course these trials include my trusty dog, Oliver Bowser.  And who doesn't love pictures of a basset hound?  (If your answer was me, this blog is probably not for you.  How can you not love those long ears, sad eyes and mound of wrinkles?)  Together he and I have been making our way through this crazy thing called life.  Now I'm going to share our path with you!

Now I can't promise that I'll blog every day.  Who has time to read my blog every day?  Do I really have even fodder to entertain anyone every single day?  However, I will try to to blog several times a week... for the length of this class.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll be hooked on blogging by then and will continue on?!